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Are You Ready to Give Up the Past?—Part I

Streets of San Miguel Allende

It’s been over two years since I last wrote on my blog and during this time I have gone into a self-imposed exile as the events of my life seemed to be trying to catch up with 2013, if in fact you believe that 2012 would be the end to an Old World and 2013 would be the beginning of a new one.

 

Well since 2012, I started physically losing pieces of my present. It came in the form of the passing of all my dogs, Mitzie, Snowy and Betty. And it didn’t just stop there. It continued with me making a gut wrenching decision to find new homes for a lot of my birds out of love for them and love for myself. It further continued with me losing my father in 2014 and at that point, it felt like I was lost at sea with no life raft to grab on to. These events were coming at me one after another and were the catalysts that propelled me into my Dark Night of the Soul. More appropriately, I would say that I was experiencing being in what my friend and mentor Lazaris calls the Dark Wood which is a metaphor for waking up one night and being in a place where you realize that “everything is wholly lost.” These literal losses were as if life was forcing me to change in ways that said that I could not go into this new reality if I was carrying around baggage from my past.

 

It is only now that I feel like putting pen to paper, so I would like to pick up from where I left off by taking you on a journey to a far away land where the events that were happening seemed to be paralleling my life.

 

My last post was on October 2, 2013 and at the end of that month I was invited by Sibyl English, the founder of Womanspeakpublications.com to give a speech along with other speakers at the Wellness and Spirituality Expo in San Miguel de Allende, Mexico, where the proceeds from the event would be donated to the Casa Organization to stop violence against women and children in San Miguel.

Brochure of Wellness & Spirituality Expo

Wellness and Spirituality Brochure

I hesitantly accepted as on one hand I was wildly excited but on the other hand, like most people, one of my greatest fears was public speaking.  However, I looked forward to my new adventure where I embarked upon a week-long tour of a most beautiful historic Colonial city that sits on a vortex about 7000 feet above sea-level where the hill-like streets are cobbled and lined on either side by long continuous walls painted mostly in yellow or burnt sienna and punctuated with doors made of wood or wrought iron depicting entrances to people’s houses or businesses. (you never know which) And even though the houses are connected and the streets are teeming with cars and people hustling and bustling; somehow behind those walls, you feel insulated as if nothing is happening outside.

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The town is filled with ex-pats who come there to retire, many of whom are artists who still live out their passion and sell their work. Behind those walls, the houses depict the Spanish architecture of entering a court yard before entering the main house.  Most of the houses are constructed on three levels with the communal areas leading out to an enclosed garden on the first level, the bedrooms on the second level and a roof top terrace overlooking the city on the third level. We stayed at a most charming hacienda with two fire places as being in a desert, the days would go into the seventies; however, the nights would dip into the forties at that time of the year. Outdoor had a beautiful covered patio with a spiral staircase leading to the roof. Adjoining the patio was the most enchanted garden with a water fountain.

(Click on the pictures to reveal a manual slideshow)

 

Sibyl took our group which comprised the speakers she had invited on a tour of the city, and the week was filled mostly with dining at her friend’s houses and at restaurants, as the town is literally filled with eating establishments as most of the retirees who live there spend much of their time socializing with each other. The town is so small that everyone knows everyone and there is no need really to have a car. People hail these green taxis that drive up and down the streets and pay three dollars each way to get where they are going. And it doesn’t take more than 5 minutes to get anywhere in town.  We even had our personal taxi driver that we would call wherever we wanted to get around.

Out Taxi Driver, Martin

Our Taxi Driver, Martin

We visited La Gruta which is a hot springs where the water is captured in three outdoor pools with one of them adjoining a tunnel made out of stones that lead to an underground pool where you can stand under a water fall flowing out of a simple PVC pipe. Talk about being in a sauna as the temperature of the water is about 100 degrees Fahrenheit. We spent the day relaxing in the water and having lunch in an outdoor garden.

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The trip would not be complete if we didn’t visit the Casa Organization where we were taken on a tour of the grounds. The center provides daycare for children and a place for mothers to find the support and the help they need to raise their families. We met some of the children and we learnt about the outreach programs to help educate the community about domestic violence.

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That inspired me even more as I gave my speech on Shame which is the foundation of my book, An Awakening, Mapping Your Dream, Vol. 1, as abuse in the form of domestic violence is one of the major ways that Shame is passed on. Giving the speech was also a time of growing and changing for me to push me out of my comfort zone of being an introvert and to step into the persona of being a public speaker, something that has give me much fear and trepidation as I previously mentioned. So one of the things I did before going on my trip was to spend some time dismantling these fears through some of the techniques which I teach in my book.

The highlight of my trip though was the Day of the Dead celebrations which were also happening that week. These events were a figurative expression of what I was experiencing which I will describe in detail in my next post.  I just want to close by saying that as I burn bridges to an old reality, I still feel disoriented like a turtle without its shell not having any concrete directions at this time; however,  I am so excited  as I build bridges to new reality, and most of all I want to say, “it feels good to be back.”

Must I Compete

 

Competition is an assumption that someone else in your market place is vying for the same money, the same clients, or the same business as you. This whole concept of competition is based on scarcity, the idea that there is not enough for both you and your competitors to have as much as you want.

Competition makes sense in fear-based reality. A reality that says rocks are hard and water is wet, and that’s just the way the world is. In a reality that says, take before you are taken, that you must fight for what you want because the world is cruel and harsh and there is not enough for everyone. It makes sense in a dog-eat-dog world of corporate greed where the big guys take all and the little guys get squashed as confirmed by the mission statement of companies such as Walmart which is to “dominate the world.”

It is reinforced by advertisements such as one that is currently being aired by Chase bank promoting the use of their credit card. In the advertisement they end with this quote: “Chase…so you can.”  Every time I watch it, I shout, “No you don’t want to do that!” You never want to have to run after anything—that means it is not within your reach.

That is the ultimate of scarcity. In the frequency of scarcity everything is in short supply which leaves you with very little choice. Manifestation and scarcity energies do not mix. They function in entirely different frequencies, so if you are competing and chasing after, know that you are operating in scarcity and you are on the short end of the stick.

Competition also breeds jealousy. Jealousy is when you think somebody has something that you feel you should have instead. It’s like you want what they have, but they’ve got it, so now you are going to have to go out and really work hard to find other ways to get what you want.

Jealousy is a simple identification with that other person as that person should have been me. Jealousy can also bring a tremendous amount of anger and blame at that other person for having what you want.  And that’s why many people who become successful become targets of the jealousy of other people as they wish and hope for an opportunity to sabotage and tear them down. Be careful with the energy of jealousy. You will always limit your prosperity, your abundance, and the amount of love you can receive, if you judge others who can receive apparently more than you.

So must you compete? There are people who are trying their best to have successful businesses, and yet it is difficult not to fall into the current model of competition which can also lead to jealousy. The current model of running a business to put it in one word is to become a workaholic, to push and drive because by golly you are competing and you’ve got to out compete.

However, the energy of the workaholic is the energy of not enough. In this energy you feel you are not successful enough. You always feel like you are not doing enough, and you always have to be doing more because you are competing with these other people and if you don’t run faster and harder than them, then they are going to take over and make the big bucks and leave you behind.

The truth is you don’t have to compete. Competition exists because of a belief in lack and a belief in fear of failure. So here’s what you can do.

The first thing to know is that there is no competition because you can create whatever you choose. There are statisticians out there that will tell you that your market is so big and only so much of the pie can be yours. Don’t fall for it. Statistics don’t count. They don’t make any difference. You are the one that makes all the difference. As a reality creator, you are creating your clients and your business. You came into this world with talents, strengths and capabilities that are unique to you. As such, nobody is going after the same market as you and you don’t need to compete against anyone.

If you will let your talents, strengths and capabilities be an expression of what my dear unseen friends Galexis calls the 3 Divine Channels of Creativity as opposed to doing whatever you do solely for money, you will find that you will be fulfilled and you probably will make lots of money because you will be doing what you love. When you base what you do according to money, you probably won’t be successful because you are making money more important than you.

The 3 Divine Channels of Creativity as described by Galexis are as follows:

  1. The first is to Love, Touch and Heal which is to connect with others, to give and receive energy to love, touch and heal.
  2. The second one is to create, to imagine, to dream, to put together something that’s fun for you, to activate your own energy, your passion, your drive and your divine flow.
  3. The third channel is to learn, to grow and to expand your awareness of yourself as a Divine Being.

Try activating any one of these three channels in whatever you do and see if you don’t find your life and your business running more smoothly.

And finally, look at a person who is successful and who is happy and enjoying what it is that you have been desiring and raise your resonance by inspiration to a level where you too can participate and experience that same joy and success that they have. You do it by saying, “This person is an inspiration for me. If they can have it, I can too. I want that for me and I choose that for me.” And rather than being jealous of them, celebrate in their success knowing that there is more than enough to go around.

I Affirm

160130-20130608Affirmations are the poster child of the New Age community. Some of them really work and some of them don’t work. You can’t be on this path and not tried them.

However, they have to be aligned and anchored really honestly in you because otherwise if you put yourself in a place where you see yourself doing something and you don’t really think you are there but you affirm yourself to be there it can confuse the heck out of the your subconscious mind. The subconscious mind says, “We are not there. We are not at that place and you are affirming “I am, I am, I am,” and in a sense it becomes an internal conflict and you start losing energy.

We’ve been told to say things like “I AM GOD, I AM GOD, I AM GOD.” And your Subconscious goes, “What the hell are they talking about?” And it doesn’t know what to do with that statement. So it scratches its figurative head, thinking how it can please you (because the Subconscious is all about consistently following commands) and then the light bulb goes off. It has a bright idea that says, “God is a lot of things. So maybe we should make them really big so that they can become all of God.” And you start to gain weight for no apparent reason. You see, the Subconscious is very literal. And that is the result of “I AM GOD.” You become fifty pounds heavier and you end up blaming it on God.

The problem with affirmations in its current form is that it needs to be worded in the present participle. To affirm “I am in perfect health” when you have a malady is just not so. To do so when you are sick sends the message to your Subconscious Mind that your present state of being represents wellness, and therefore, it keeps you in that condition. You need to say instead, “I am getting better every day,” putting it into the “ing” form and continuing until you get to the state of health you want to be in.

 

What About Human Dignity?

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It was supposed to a joyous event. It was April 15th, 2013 in a small and insulated city called Boston where the oldest marathon was being held on a holiday called Patriot’s Day. It’s like a weekend block party where schools are closed and families come to have fun to watch 26,000 runners run for personal reasons, one of which is raising capital for various charities that mean something to them such as cancer victims, supporting Iraq war veterans or fallen veterans.

Every runner knows what it’s like to turn the corner on Boylston Street and see the finish line and see families cheering them. As if it was planned for when the runners would be making their home stretch, two pressure cooker bombs containing shrapnel and smokeless gun powder intended to injure, maim and put terror into people exploded. Even though it is the most televised marathon creating a greater possibility of being spotted, someone was emboldened to make a statement. It was an act of terrorism, an act intended to communicate fear to a wider audience than their actual victims.

Mayhem ensued where three people were killed and many others lost their limbs or were severely wounded. And it became a 24 hour news cycle of reporting the event featuring experts on terrorism, and disaster preparedness, and FBI profilers. Even the conspiracy theorists joined in.

This was like a bomb explosion that we hear about in the news in Israel or Bagdad. What were we to do? Some of the experts were saying that we need to be more vigilant, calling for more heightened security. This was a social event.  We already have our bodies and bags searched for weapons at our airports and many of our sporting events. Others said that we should have military police patrolling in front of restaurants and nightclubs like in Israel or have live surveillance cameras at every corner like in London.

It evolved into an intense effort to focus all resources on catching the perpetrator, to discover the motive and the mindset of the person or persons responsible for this.

While this was playing out, I started to ponder what this was all about?

Why did we allow this into our reality?  We didn’t go out to create it, but we allowed it. (see previous article.)  Was our reality trying to talk to us about fear, about security, about freedom, about forgiveness, justice or retribution? That’s when I saw a 30 second interview that made me take notice. There was a man with his entire hands and arms covered in blood and he was holding a small equally blood drenched American flag. He was telling the story how he was in the crowd waving the flag when the bombs went off and how he ran over to one of the victims who had both their legs blown off by the blast and how he picked this person up and took them to the medical tent. And I thought to myself, “This is about human dignity.” You see, tragedy and dignity are akin. As awful as it may seem; many times, it is through the avenue of tragedy that we find our dignity. It is even represented archetypally in Greek mythology by Melpomene, the Muse of Tragedy and Dignity.  Dignity is to sense the majesty, the sense of respect and honor, and the sense of benevolence that is within a person or thing.  It’s about the capacity to honor oneself and to honor other people. It’s about having a relationship with one’s Soul, and sensing the Soul of others.

People risked their own lives that day in order to save others. When so many instincts were to run away, people ran to. Among them were the first responders who ran into the chaos to save lives. People showed up at the hospitals to give blood to the victims. As President Obama puts it, “There were so many acts of heroism and acts of selflessness and generosity and love of those who stayed behind to help the wounded.”

The perpetrators were eventually caught. One was killed and the other was apprehended. They were brothers whose family was granted political asylum from persecution and allowed to come to America. Following their capture, their uncle was asked in an interview, “How do you feel about America?” He answered, “This country gives a chance to everyone to be treated like a human being.” When I heard his answer, I was even more convinced that through this horrific tragedy, one of the questions our reality is forcing us to address is, “What about human dignity?”

You Create Your Own Reality

We are each creating our own reality, twenty-four hours a day. The problem is that we are not conscious we are doing it. And how do we create reality? We create reality by either consciously creating it, or by allowing it. To consciously create reality is to deliberately go about trying to manifest something. For instance, you decide you want to buy a car. Are you just going to buy any old car? No, you aren’t. You decide on what make and model you want. You decide on the color. Whether it is gear shift or automatic. All these decisions are consciously putting together what you want.

On the other hand, people who are not consciously creating their reality are allowing reality to be created for them. When you allow reality, you work with the Law of Attraction. If you do not look at what you think and what you believe, then the thoughts that you have stored in your consciousness are going to, by default, go out there and pick up whatever is like it and bring it back to you.

I know that when I heard the concept that You Create your Own Reality, something rang true for me. I didn’t know how I knew, but I just knew that I knew. If you recognize that on some level, you’ve created everything, then knowing that you create your reality is a good thing because if you created it, then you can do something about it, as opposed to if someone else created it for you, then you will have to wait on them to fix it. You might be waiting forever. The whole premise for writing my book, “An Awakening, Mapping Your Dream, Vol. 1″, was to show you how you can create your reality.

Every time you make a choice or a decision, you are creating your reality. Now some of us are in situations where we feel powerless and that we don’t really have a lot of choice. It might be something we don’t want to do or something we are obligated to do by contract such as a job. Every challenge that comes to you is an opportunity, and every opportunity that comes to you is a challenge for you to be able to respond as a powerful reality creator and to make your choices from this position. That’s why you have an arrangement with life to show you where you are giving your power away in order to give you an opportunity to take it back and become the powerful creator that you are.

What if you had enough love and value of yourself that you could allow your reality to love and value you because it is consistent with who you are? What if all the unpleasant realities that come to you is just the universe’s way of saying, “Look, partner, here is an issue where you have in the past given away your power, your freedom and your love… and in order for you to be who you truly are; a powerful reality creator, you need to retrieve your power, your freedom and your love.”

If it’s something you have to do and don’t want to do, choose to do it as a creator and not as a victim. Choose to be an empowered being by saying, “I choose to do this in my light, and in my power while being fully present.” If there is a problem, say,” I am going to anticipate that this is somehow going to be solved with magic,” even though you don’t know how the magic is going to show up. When you make choices in your power, you and your reality get hooked up. And once you get hooked up consistently, your reality and your choice become one. When you and your reality become one, you better get ready to receive it. It’s time to love your reality and let your reality love you—by giving to you through choice, your desires and your wishes.

How Can I Help Someone I Care For?

Friend Helping Friend

Friend helping Friend

If you are in a boat, and someone falls overboard, do you jump in and help them?  Maybe they created you in their reality to save them. When it’s someone who you love and care for, what do you do? There is a fine line about what to do for them. You step over that line and you are being overbearing and manipulative, yet on the other side of the line, you may feel passive and powerless.

When people that you care for go though challenges that to you might not seem necessary, know that it is necessary for them. Life always shows us where we are giving our power away and it gives us the opportunity to heal it, sometimes over and over again until we get it. This may be the way that they get conscious, so don’t go and try to personally fix it for them.

Well, what about doing meditations for them where you see everything turning out alright? That’s beautiful, but it probably would not make sense to them with the self images that they are holding, so psychically they would not be able to receive it. But here’s a simple variation on the theme that you can do which will be much more effective.

Imagine breathing them in and put love into, and infuse light into their situation and give it to their Higher Selves.  Their Higher Self is the non-physical aspect of them who has  their best interest at heart because they are part of them. Some people tend to think of their Higher Self as their guardian angel. They are not really, but it’s perfectly Okay to think of them that way.

 By doing this, you won’t feel powerless and their Higher Self can give it them in a way that they can receive it. Their Higher Self will thank you and it will make a difference. It will probably mitigate or lessen some of the intensity and some of the challenges, but realize that sometimes when others are going through their darkness, it is their turning point to the light. And even though you love and care for them and it can be devastating and painful for you to watch, know that by sending love to them, you are making their lives more elegant so that fewer hearts get broken and fewer lives get shattered. And with the holidays just around the corner, what could be a better gift?

How to Break Out of Negative Patterns

A Way Out

A Way Out

To break a negative pattern that repeats over and over again, whether it’s a big pattern such as, “I always pick the wrong man,” to a little pattern such as, “I always seem to forget to call so and so” (because I really don’t want to), both have a common thread in that it is some form of resistance to being in the flow of magic and feeling powerful.

Every negative pattern has its root in some belief in limitation, whether others gave it to you, such as your well intentioned mother telling you that, “You can’t trust men,” because she happened to end up with a womanizing alcoholic drunk, as in the first example of, “I always pick the wrong man.” Or it is born out of some prior experience where you made up a limiting belief of your own, such as “whenever I talk to that person, we always get into an argument; therefore, I don’t want to talk to them,” as in the second example of, “I always forget to call so and so.”

Beliefs are powerful things. I’m sure you’ve heard the concept that thoughts are things and that everything has a vibration or frequency. If thoughts are things, then they also have a frequency. You’ve probably also heard that like attracts like. So the thoughts you are putting out there are attracting like things unto themselves. Well, your beliefs are thoughts that something is true and will attract to you what you believe. Your beliefs set up the parameters of what you will experience. You will not experience something outside of what you believe. That is why by your belief that, “You can’t trust men,”— you can go to a party and across a crowded room, you never seem to be able to find a valiant man, but you have an uncanny ability to pick out and be attracted to the only “heel” there. How powerful is that? It is also why you conveniently forget to call that person because there is a belief that if you talk to them there is going to be a big hassle based on a cause and effect relationship that you have put on the situation and you don’t want to deal with it.

You hear people say, “I would not believe it if I didn’t see it.” Well, it’s the other way around. The reason you saw it was because you believed it and the proof serves to reinforce your beliefs and patterns which keeps them in place and keeps them happening over and over again.

So, how can you break out of negative patterns caused by beliefs that repeat over and over? These patterns can only be broken in the following ways:

 

1. First of all you have to own that you are the creator of your reality. This puts you into your own power and takes you out of victim consciousness.

2. You must also own that you created the pattern out of the acceptance that you had of a limited belief made available to you by others or one that you made up for yourself.

3. Whenever a negative pattern that repeats itself shows up, thank the universe for showing you this pattern again because now you have the opportunity to recognize, “I am not creating my own reality, or I am pretending not to create my own reality and here’s a place where I can take my power back and I can make a new choice.”

4. Now, from a powerful reality creator position, change your belief by realizing for example that that was your mother’s belief of her reality that she gave to you and you decided to accept it because if you analyze it, that belief isn’t true. The reality is there are men out there who are good and true and faithful but by your belief, you will never meet them. Realize that the only reason you are getting the ensuing outcome is because through the Law of Attraction, the universe if fulfilling your belief. So, do whatever you need to do to change the belief that isn’t serving you. In my practice, I teach people how to access their Subconscious and Unconscious Minds where beliefs are stored and I teach them how to replace their current belief with a new belief.

5. With your new belief in place, make a different choice and with your intention, inform the Universe that this is your new choice. This will break you out of the old pattern.

And as like attracts like, your reality will have no other alternative but to reflect back to you your new belief. Yes, beliefs are powerful things.

 

Why, Ultimately…You Cannot Fail

Success In Hand

Success In Hand

In my previous two articles, “What’s Up with Failure,” and “How Can I Turn Failure into Success?” I described the parameters of failure and what you can do to succeed; but ultimately, here’s the reason why you cannot fail. YOU cannot fail because of who you are. You are divine by your very nature. You are a piece of God, of Goddess, of All That Is. Even if you don’t call it God or Goddess, you are a piece of the All That Isness that is around you. Mark you, you are a very small piece, like a tiny cell; but that doesn’t matter because we are part of a hologram. In a hologram, any piece can be used to reconstruct the whole. So even though we are like a tiny cell, within that tiny cell contains the blue print of the whole. And that whole, by whatever name you want to call it, cannot fail.

You are a powerful reality creator who wanted to play with creativity. As such, you signed up for Creativity 101 on a planet where you gave yourself “time” so that things wouldn’t manifest instantly as you thought about them because you wanted to work with creating from scratch, where you could take things apart and put them back together again. You certainly didn’t think that if something didn’t turn out right the first time, you would be a failure; you thought that would be a lot of fun to experiment. And you couldn’t have picked a more creative planet. There is an abundance of raw materials in the many different varieties of life that we have here. It’s as if God & Goddess get to take out their Play-Doh and their paint kit and have a blast. Look at a giraffe. If that is not imagination and creativity at its height, then I don’t know what is.

One Sunday morning, I was flipping through the channels on the television and I came across Joel Olsteen in the middle of giving a sermon where he was illustrating a story about trust. In the story, a man placed a hundred dollar bill in a bible and then went to his wife and asked her to open the Bible and give him a hundred dollars. She said, “You know I can’t do that!” to which he replied, “Do you trust me?”

She said, “Yes I do, but I can’t open this Bible and give you a hundred dollars.”

He again told her to trust him and do what he asked which she did, and of course, as she opened the Bible, there was the hundred dollar bill. She said, “How did you know it would be there?” The man replied, “Because I put it there.” Well, in the same way you can trust one hundred percent that God/Goddess/All That Is, put in you that you cannot fail.

The only way you can fail is if you view it through the eyes of the consensus where you are taught that if you do not create and manifest what it is that you are going after, that if you don’t get what it is you are desiring, then you have failed. Throw out this definition, return to your divinity and look at success as a grand adventure in discovering and exploring life the way it was meant to be.

Shame On You

Child feeling Ashamed

Child feeling Ashamed

Many writers have written on topics such as Anger and Forgiveness as I have done in my book, An Awakening, Mapping Your Dream, Vol.1, but none have written on these two subjects from the vantage point  of two very evolved non-physical beings. And then to add “Shame” into the mix, in my opinion is a gift. For me, the gift came in the form of learning how to process and heal these three blockages wholly and completely so that I could have the opportunity to live a happy life and sharing that information has been the reason for my book . Of course, there are no words that could ever express my gratitude to my two Unseen Friends, Lazaris and Galexis for the difference they have made in my life.

Most  people know something about Anger and Forgiveness, but few know about Shame even though it is built into the system and is necessary on the planet at this time. No one gets to escape it. Shame is something you must deal with as part of your journey going Home and there is going to come a time on your journey when you know that you must deal with it if you want to heal and have a happy life.

Just the mere sound of the word is depressing and I think that when people hear the word “Shame,” even if they know nothing about it, subconsciously and unconsciously, they know it’s something they don’t want to confront. I will not lie to you. Shame is a heavy- duty thing.

In the Bible, it says that “The sins of the father will be passed on for seven generations.” The sin it was referring to is Shame. Shame is passed to each generation. That means we had Shame passed on to us by our parents, and they had Shame passed on to them by their parents, and it gets passed down for seven generations. It becomes part of the heritage that is passed on. It is not genetic or environmental. It is cultural. Shame can either facilitate the development of self or the destruction of self. The former was the original intent of Shame, but somewhere along the line it got screwed up, and “Negative Shame” has been culturally inbred in us.

This negative Shame has evolved into two kinds. The first kind is the Shame of Being. It is a belief that you are not divine by nature, that you are flawed, ugly, and have to earn the right to live. The second is the Shame of Doing, and has to do with whether or not your behavior pleases those around you so that you can get their love. Shame is insidious and destructive by nature. As children, Shame is passed on to us through many vehicles, such as teachers, authority figures, religion, and primarily by parents or guardians who take care of us. Moreover, Shame can only be healed by giving it back to the offender because as arbitrary as it may sound, one of the tenets of Shame is, “If you do not heal your Shame by giving it back to the offender, YOU WILL PASS IT ON.”

So, what’s it’s purpose? Why is it so necessary? What Shame is intended to do is produce a thing called remorse. Remorse is the ability to make a mistake, to admit it, to be embarrassed or ashamed of our actions or our behavior, or the impact we have had. In other words, it is the ability to know when you are wrong. Remorse allows you to make mistakes. It allows you to be human. That it’s all right for you to be less than perfect and it’s all right for others to be less than perfect. Remorse does a number of other things like allowing us to be forgiven when we have done something wrong for example, and Shame was intended to build remorse in people.

Well, what happens in the absence of remorse? People who don’t feel remorse are capable of committing heinous crimes without feeling any sorrow, or guilt, or culpability for their actions. For example, they will shoot you dead for your wallet for no reason at all, except for the fact that they wanted it. And a lot of times people who don’t feel remorse end up becoming psychopaths and sociopaths. When the seeds of remorse never get planted, this is the ultimate result.

Through my experience, I have found that when you become aware of what Shame is, there is a tendency to feel outraged at its purpose. What maniac would have concocted such a scheme? Lazaris says it was never meant to be this painful, but that somewhere along the way it went awry. However, if you can heal the anger, the pain, and the Shame, you can stop the cycle of passing it on and you can come to a place where you can understand the original intent and you can come to peace with it, which by the way is one of the steps in healing Shame.

Are You Ready…To Get Humble?

Lowly Worm

Lowly Worm

Humility as I have been taught, which I am sure you have been taught by the bible and other well-meaning sources is being this kind of groveling worm that says, “Oh God. I am so unworthy…What do you want me to do? Direct me and I will do whatever your bidding is.” Well, if you think that’s what it is, then you will be waiting for a very long time because God will never tell you what to do. This is a free-will universe; therefore, God will wait until you decide what it is that you want to do, and believe me, God has a lot of time on his hands. In this free-will universe, God/Goddess/All That Is always says, “Yes.” If you ask them, “Can I be lonely?” The answer is, “Yes.” “Can I have a car accident?” They will say, “Well, I wish you wouldn’t, but Yes.” Similarly, if you ask them, “Can I be happy?” “Can I be healthy?” “Can I have lots of money?” The answer is yes, yes and yes. The choice is always yours to make and God and Goddess will always affirm your decision.

In the same way, humility is a way of making you responsible for your choices. The real meaning of humility is the willingness to let every situation be brand new.

Humility says that even though I failed at this thing for the umpteenth time, I know that this time it can be different. Lack of humility says it probably won’t work again.

On the other hand, just because this other thing has always worked for me, I am not going to take it for granted. Humility says that whatever has gone before doesn’t mean it has to go that way again.

On the negative side, it’s easy to see, but on the positive side it is not as clear cut. If it has always gone great, then expect it to go that way, but realize that it’s up to you to create it that way. Know that it is up to you to continue to create it being as wonderful as it has always been. Because you see, what you are doing is being responsible for your reality, both the good and the bad, knowing that it is up to you to choose to make your reality whatever you want it to be. And it’s easy to do when things are going great. And when they are not, that’s when you have to remind yourself that just because it’s always been the same old grind, this time it can be different. And choose for it to be different.